Not A Good Idea
by Joe Martucci
by Joe Martucci
One day Paul Jordan, who was known worldwide as P.J., was working out because he wanted to be the best d-lineman ever for the University of Southeast West Virginia Malamutes. Happily he finished and went to the weighing machine. Hoping that he would be 270 lbs, he suddenly realized that he was 150 lbs. All of the sudden P.J. dashed to the astonished vendor and demanded the biggest hamburger ever, the 150 lb double bacon cheeseburger with 10 times the amount of tomatoes as any other hamburger in the world. It took him the rest of the day and all night to eat it, but he did. The next day he started at defensive tackle and got an interception on the goal line and ran it back 99 yards. On the one yard line he stopped, he couldn’t go one more step, but luckily, Jameal O’Neal tackled him from behind and pushed him in the end zone and the Malamutes won.
by Rose O'Connor
Keith Carrington lived in Salt Lake City, Utah. He wanted to help with a children’s daycare, but he had a different occupation; he was a street sign. Early one morning one of the children crossing the street noticed cars were going 35 miles per hour on a school zone. Looking to see the reason for the speeding vehicles she realized that Keith was gone from his street sign. About two hours later at children’s daycare, after being toyed about for too long a time, Keith decided he was a better street sign than toy. Suddenly Keith remembered "whatever you hand findeth to do, do it well."
The Homeless Dogs
By Timothy Ketron
In 2011, an 8.9 earthquake hit Japan and 15 minutes later an unexpected tsunami hit. (2) During that time there were many homeless dogs, so the cat club rallied up their cats and started to look for those dogs.(3) Unfortunately the homeless dogs did not know about this cat club, so they were hiding in the rubble. What would you do if you were the cats and can’t find any dogs? Well the cats stole some cranes and picked up those heavy pieces of rubble and threw them into the sea. (4) Lifting up the rubble, one darting cat whose name was Purrruchshe found the dogs, he jumped for joy and called for the cat club to come and help him. So all the dogs that were homeless now had a home.